I’m teaching a class this quarter for Miami International Seminary on counseling addicts. Last night I went over the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous with the class. The reaction that many had to the fourth and fifth steps was interesting.
Step Four: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Step Five: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
“That’s terrifying!” “I’m emotionally exhausted just thinking about it.” “No way would I ever do that!” “Why would anyone want to do that?”
I’ve often heard addicts say similar things. Many resist taking those steps. Some take quite a bit of convincing to get them to see value of getting all their “junk” out. But then addicts, usually, have been hiding and lying and deceiving for years. They don’t have much practice in being honest about themselves or even with themselves.
One of the reasons that many have continued to drink or use was so they wouldn’t have to face their junk. Which is precisely the point why they need to get it all out.
James wrote that we should confess our sins to one another (James 5:16). He understood the when leave hiding and live in the light that we can thrive. Doing so can set you free from a lot of baggage.
I expected people with years of experience in church and learning the Bible would understand the value of dealing with their stuff. But their reaction was no different from what I’ve typically heard from addicts. So I guess we’re not so different after all.
But what do we do with that? I mean do we need to make it public? Is private examination enough? I feel in part that the world does not need to know my dirty laundry, but on the flip side why not? Is it just my shame that makes me want to keep such things to myself. I mean you could limit it to a number of close and trusted people for accountability sake... But is not making such things public only trying to maintain the mask of "I've got it all togetherness?"
ReplyDeleteI just discovered your blog...great title.
ReplyDeleteFor me, the hope for healing is becoming greater than my fear of judgment; that hope is what frees me up to be willing to tell my junk. (I agree with M. above though about limiting it to close, trustworthy people -- at least, at first.)